this post was submitted on 18 Jul 2024
850 points (98.3% liked)

Funny

6532 readers
698 users here now

General rules:

Exceptions may be made at the discretion of the mods.

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
all 48 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 114 points 1 month ago (3 children)

Wow if racoon paws can do that damage imagine a what a crowbar can do.

[–] [email protected] 141 points 1 month ago (3 children)

Or a raccoon with a crowbar

[–] [email protected] 38 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Only a good raccoon with a crowbar can stop a bad raccoon with a crowbar.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 month ago

No such thing as a bad raccoon with a crowbar

[–] [email protected] 23 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Or a racoon with a heavy steel ball.

[–] [email protected] 43 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

Or a raccoon with a machine gun

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

This image feels like its from fucking Crestline.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago

Or a cane-wielding racoon with a long family history of breaking into stuff.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 1 month ago

Or a crow with a racoonbar.

[–] [email protected] 33 points 1 month ago (1 children)

A crowbar can seriously damage pretty much any vehicle. Nobody believes Elon's promise that it would be sturdy as a tank. Out of all Cybertruck failures, lack of prying protection is one of the least concerning.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago

That section is a rubber like section to seal the gate against the tonneau cover. Not surprising at all that paws and teeth can tear it.

[–] [email protected] 52 points 1 month ago (2 children)

I trained them to do that! I'm so proud of them

(I continue to give others permission to recycle this joke and tell as many people they can they're training Raccoons to break into Cybertrucks in the hopes we can eventually convince Elon Musk its true)

[–] [email protected] 19 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Elon is a level 7 susceptible. Your comment alone is enough.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago

Just think though if we all keep saying it until he's seeing it all over the place. A raccoon breaking into a Cybertruck should be like... Our mascot

[–] [email protected] 50 points 1 month ago

If it walks like a duck..

[–] [email protected] 39 points 1 month ago

Makes sense, every Cybertruck probably smells like an incel. I'd assume it was trash, too

[–] [email protected] 24 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 25 points 1 month ago (3 children)

I watched a documentary about racoons. It mainly focused on raccoons that live in the city and how they adapted to city life. City raccoons adapted so well that city racoons and country raccoons would not be able to survive in each other's world.

If I recall correctly, cities helped the spread of racoons throughout North America. Any animal that has is able to adapt so easily is far more clever than we give them credit for.

And since they aren't bound by human laws, I fully support them in vandalising and trashing these Cyber Truck monstrosities. I'm eternally jealous that they can look so cute while accidentally rebelling against Musk.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 month ago

orcas 🤝 racoons

fucking with humans

[–] [email protected] 8 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Racoons, Rats, Mice, Dogs (domestic dogs that beame wild) and our house cats all adapt super well to basically every environment where humans can live.

I don't think country racoons would have that big problems with going in a city and the other way around, from what i know they teach each other.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Country raccoons aren't aware of the dangers of motor vehicles. City raccoons would have been taught by their mother how to wait and avoid such obstacles. Foraging for food in bins is also a lot different than hunting for food in a more wild setting. The diets are vastly different with the mother again showing the young how to search and obtain food in their respective environments.

Yes, racoons can teach each other but from my understanding, a lot of that teaching is from mother to child.

I do not expect a city human to be able to head into the wild and survive without a considerable amount of training before heading out. A wild human would have a difficult time adjusting to the city life without starting out with some money.

I still stand by my original statement unless I can be proven otherwise.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Country racoons are absolutely aware of the danger of motor vehicles lol

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

I don't believe all raccoons live near roads. It is entirely possible for some animals to have minimal or no contact with human infrastructure. The world is a big place even if it feels small at times.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago

We know crows have sub-cultures and teach each other, so no surprize if some of the smarter mammals do the same.

[–] [email protected] 14 points 1 month ago

The lookout: Take your time, boys. Take your time.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago (1 children)

That’s funny but it’s probably one or two incidents among the sea of fools who bought this thing and not worth actually speculating some larger trend over

[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago (3 children)

Compare that with the absolutely massive number of other trucks with tonneau covers, and how often they get vandalized by racoons.

The Cybertruck is still a very rare vehicle. 2 instances is quite a lot statistically.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 month ago

are you fucking kidding me?! I personally know four people who's wiring harnesses were destroyed by squirrels. One who's seats were destroyed by a raccoon that opened an unlocked fucking door, and one who's vehicle was totalled by a horse.

You've never seen stories like these because none of them happened to a Tesla.

Oh I know a guy who transported a goat in a BMW, and miraculously nothing bad happened. Does that mean BMW's are goat proof?!

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago

No. 2 is small numbers statistically. Perhaps you meant 2 is quite a lot percentage wise.

[–] [email protected] -2 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

No one actually trying to make an empirical claim about this can possibly get away with 1 or 2 randomly claimed/unverified social media posts against over 11,500 cybertrucks. Musk is a piece of shit and his truck is dangerous trash but y’all are letting the lulz cloud your judgment.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (2 children)

My dearly beloved ham sandwich, this is a meme and not a dissertation. You seem to be the only person here taking it this seriously – I doubt folks walked away from this meme completely convinced there's now an epidemic of raccoons breaking into Cybertrucks

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

What's that you say - there's an epidemic of raccoons breaking into Cybertrucks??

I'm off to tweet this immediately.