this post was submitted on 19 Aug 2024
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[–] [email protected] 44 points 1 month ago

With those other rules in place no self-respecting Penguin would set foot in that place anyway

[–] [email protected] 32 points 1 month ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

Damn right, I wanna kick back with Opus and Bill the cat!

Profanity? Naturally. Booze? Of course. Nudity? Nobody's dressing Opus. (And hookers, with Bill)

TheSign lists all the mandatory elements for a righteous evening, Bill's way: breaking all the rules

Ah, reverse psychology.

Cigars all around!

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago

Man I need to find the record I have that came with this comic.

[–] [email protected] 29 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Funny story actually... you know that Robbie Williams song Me And My Monkey? Well, all that, but switch the monkey with a penguin.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Oh wow, Robbie Williams has a penguin?

[–] [email protected] 5 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

No, a monkey.

And not actually, no, the lyrics have an entirely different meaning. The monkey in the song is him under the influence of drugs.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 4 weeks ago

Then what does his penguin mean? ( I am just trying to be funny )

[–] [email protected] 17 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Seems like your average penguin is covered under the "no nudity" policy. But I like the idea that a penguin walked in with shorts and a tshirt on and they were like, dammit, take down the sign, we need to add one more.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago) (1 children)

Penguins are always following the black or white tie dresscode.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago

Dont get into KitKatClub I guess

[–] [email protected] 13 points 1 month ago

"I don't care if his name is Tux – get him out of here!"

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 month ago (3 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago

Hack their windows 95 billing system

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 9 points 1 month ago (2 children)
[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago

But they're always wearing evening casual wear. Very classy.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

But why double ban them... they're already covered with the no nudity rule.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago (1 children)

Q: What did the nude penguin say to the profane alcoholic? A: I don't remember but it had something to do with smoking.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 1 month ago

If she starts smoking, use more lube.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago
[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago

Well then I'll just look elsewhere for my escort

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago (1 children)

That's weird I just looked the place up and they sell all kinds of beer there lol

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago

Not sure if it's because of the liquor license or other regulation, but this is to prevent customers from bringing their own alcohol in.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago

So no linux users. Their loss

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago

Are puffins allowed at least?

[–] [email protected] 6 points 1 month ago* (last edited 1 month ago)

The second one made me dislike them, but the fifth one was the straw that broke the camel's back.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago (2 children)

Banned from club: penguins

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

We need an Openstreetmap Tag for that

[–] [email protected] 1 points 1 month ago

Banned from club: penguins from Club Penguin Island (the fictional location)

[–] [email protected] 4 points 1 month ago (1 children)

This is kind of redundant isn’t it? Every penguin I’ve ever known swears, smokes and drinks like a sailor. And I’ve never seen one dressed in clothes.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 1 month ago

What do you mean? They all wear a tuxedo

[–] [email protected] 3 points 1 month ago

The power of suggestion has turned the f in profanity into a tiny penguin facing away from me.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 4 weeks ago

It doesn't say "No drugs" tho, I'm finna get lit in that bitch 😈

[–] [email protected] 2 points 1 month ago

No Tux, no bux.