This shit post is a shit post. Perfection.
this post was submitted on 19 Jul 2023
425 points (99.3% liked)
Lemmy Shitpost
26230 readers
3274 users here now
Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.
Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!
Rules:
1. Be Respectful
Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.
Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.
...
2. No Illegal Content
Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.
That means:
-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals
-No CSA content or Revenge Porn
-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)
...
3. No Spam
Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.
-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.
-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.
-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers
-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.
...
4. No Porn/Explicit
Content
-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.
-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.
...
5. No Enciting Harassment,
Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts
-Do not Brigade other Communities
-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.
-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.
-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.
...
6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.
-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.
-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.
...
If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.
Also check out:
Partnered Communities:
1.Memes
10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)
Reach out to
All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker
founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
Compared with people who pooped once a day, constipated participants had significantly worse cognition equivalent to three years more of chronological cognitive aging, the authors found. Increased risk was also found among those who pooped more than twice daily, though these higher odds were small.
Not pooping often enough? Jail. Pooping too often? Believe it or not, also jail
I tried to upvote your comment twice... I'm stupid maybe I don't poop enough
My 3-year-old niece is chronically constipated, so I think this must mean she's as smart as a 6-year-old.
load more comments
(1 replies)
This surely makes me a fucking genius
Stunning
kind of obvious to say ig but correlation =/= causation. for ex: fiber, (the plant material in our diets that is undigestable by us, but is digestible by the healthy bacteria in our intestines) both leads to a healthy "gut microbiome" while having the side effect of making your poops bigger and softer, such that it is easier for your intestines to push it through your digestive system.
Still, in case anyone was wondering, you are supposed to be pooping, aka "having bowel movements" ~~once every day~~ 2-3 times every day. If you aren't that regular, you may need to eat more beans & grains and less processed foods & meats
you are supposed to be pooping, aka "having bowel movements" once every day.
Citation needed, pretty sure this is long outdated. Afaik, anything from 3 times a day to once every three days is fine.
Can confirm, I poop 3 sometimes even 4 times a day and I'm literally the smartest person I know
load more comments
(2 replies)
OP's making anti-shitposts... Get him!
I poop once a year but it takes all year. How do we classify that?
You're full of shit.
Not anymore!
Big TP will go bankrupt
It's like Ja'Loja but stinkier and backwards.
load more comments
(1 replies)
I poop like 3 times a day or more. Almost always about 30 minutes after I eat. I poop when I wake up. I'll poop 1 or two times at work. I'll poop usually about an hour before bed. I poop when I walk around walmart
I poop a lot
I literally just got done pooping
In all seriousness, that's too much. If you are going directly after eating you've got some gi issues going on. Going that frequently can also mess up your gut flora and exacerbate whatever else you've got going on. Are you able to see a gastroenterologist?
3 times per day is normal and healthy. 30 minutes after you eat isn't the food you just ate, either.
load more comments
(3 replies)
Same. I also have ibs so...
Do yourself a favor and get some psyllium husk. Don’t overdo it with the stuff , take it once daily to start, but it will make it so you don’t have to go multiple times a day. Also it’s good for you.
load more comments
(1 replies)
Is this being posted here because of the user who didn't poop for 3 days?
Shitpost taken literally
When that burrito plug came loose, my brain started working again in bliss. I believe!
Now we need to find the poster who wanted to hold it in for three days and see if there has been a cognitive decline.... for science
So what does it mean when you poop 8 times a day?
You may be on the path to unlock the ability to use 100% of your brain!
It's time to see a doctor.
Startlingly relevant to this sub in two ways
If a genie ever gives me three wishes, one of them will be that I never have to use the bathroom again. I hate every second of it. Maybe the cognitive decline is worth avoiding pooping so often.
Born to shit, forced to wipe
Don't let them tell you what to do brother
This wish seems ripe for an evil genie to just cause you to fall over dead on the spot and say "well technically..."
Just my luck...
load more comments
(2 replies)
"Do you want Beans memes? Because that's how you get Beans memes."
I must be a genius because I'm three times a day. I need to stick to my FODMAP diet
load more comments
(1 replies)
When else are you gonna doomscroll
Thanks to my anti-rejection meds (or one of the other meds I take along with them) my poop has been easy peasy. Like soft serve.
how tf can someone go 3 days w/o pooping? I'm taking steps after the first day.
Real talk: Opioid abuse. I somehow never became addicted, but I did use them recreationally. I did have legitimate medical issues (gull stones, before surgery). But sometimes I just liked the high. With that said, opioids can cause delayed poops. Many other factors too, like dehydration, not enough fiber and GI conditions.
But anyone that's somehow purposely holding it that long should see a doctor, and counseling.
load more comments
(1 replies)
What about pooping 3x a day?
Linked to cognitive IMPROVEMENT, research finds (probably)
And all this time I was accused of shitting my brains out.
That's some rough shit
Oh no, Hank Hill is gonna be so distressed :c
view more: next ›